September 6, 2007

Bing Law 101

Posted in Must See TV, Work at 8:10 am by Faith

After taking a phone call from a prospective client for a criminal defense matter (the fact-gathering interview has already taken place):

Faith: (to supervising attorney) Could this guy BE any guiltier?


Yes, if I’m going to practice criminal defense, I’ve decided to master the art of practicing law as only Chandler Bing could.


September 3, 2007

Say WHAT?!?

Posted in Work at 12:00 am by Faith

(Faith’s first day at the office)

Senior Partner: Okay, Faith… we’re going to be billing you out at (amount) dollars per hour.
Faith: (long pause) No offense, but there’s no way in Hell I’d pay that for my services.
Senior Partner: (laughs heartily, then glances at Faith, who’s not laughing.)
Faith: I’m serious.

July 10, 2007

No Whammies, No Whammies….

Posted in Bar Exam, Life, Random, Rants, Work at 4:42 pm by Faith

You know, I was thinking about this the other day. And I got kinda fired up. The point of having an anonymous blog is to be able to share things ANONYMOUSLY. You’d think this would mean that I would be more honest about my life. Yet, I find that I censor quite a bit of detail about myself. I’m gonna clear up some of that right now.

In my last post, I apologized for the lack of posting. I haven’t just been busy. I’m not simply a “recent graduate school graduate.” As some of you already know, I’m a recent law school grad. *gasp* Shocking, I know. I’m not JUST going through “life changes…” I’m studying for the flippin’ Bar Exam!

Frankly, it’s been kicking my ass. I’m scared, and I need a place to vent. Normally, I would have turned to my online “journal,” so to speak… but I couldn’t say anything without revealing that little detail of myself, so I’ve been omitting it since this blog’s inception. But it’s out now. I feel… not that much better, but now at least I can freak out about taking online tests, only to find that I’ve been failing miserably… and that I secretly want to slash my cocky classmate’s tires because they’ve been talking so much smack about “acing” this exam when all I’m worried about is making sure I get a 60.0% overall. That’s right. A 60% is a passing score…. and I’m not shooting for much higher than that.

My head is a jumble of Constitutional Law, Torts, Property, Criminal Law, and all the other fun subjects my State requires. I have no clue how to organize it all and I’m afraid that when I’m sitting to take the test, I’m going to spaz out and forget everything. Anyone out there have any tips for a freaked out gal like myself?

So there you have it. Faith = really a recent law graduate. I’m not telling you where I live. Sorry. LisaB only just told us she was from Texas… and THAT took her two years, so don’t press your luck, please. You’ll end up fishing for whammys.

Oh, my GAWD, I miss that show! That is so going to be my Bar-cramming motto….

“Big bucks, big bucks, no whammies, no whammies….”


June 7, 2007

Karma Chameleon

Posted in Life, Random, Work at 4:08 pm by Faith

Those of you that have been following me around have heard all about my encounters with a catty classmate. For those of you just tuning in, Catty Classmate (original, right?) was a person I had classes with and was generally friendly towards. They seemed like a really nice person, so when I found out that CC and I both had summer jobs in the same town, I was pretty stoked.

Fast-forward a few months. Catty Classmate, for reasons I STILL haven’t figured out, did everything in their power to get me fired from my summer job. I have no reasons to think what they did was out of anything but pure maliciousness. Catty Classmate never found out that I knew for a fact that THEY were the one who started everything. (My former boss, cool dude that he was, spilled the beans and identified CC as the instigator.)

In any case, I was forced to work with CC over the course of the next year. This did not please me. AT ALL. Although I’m a crappy crappy poker player, I managed to keep my hand firmly to my chest when it came to CC. I was a good co-worker, always friendly and was even known to sit down and gab with CC at great length. CCNEVER knew that I secretly plotted their demise.

Anyway, I JUST found out that CC and I have both secured real-world jobs. Although we have similar work experience (and I’m sure CC had better grades,) is it wrong that I’m totally basking in the fact that I’m being paid about $5,000 more per year?

Hee hee hee hee…. you’ve gotta love karma sometimes.

April 23, 2007

The Art of Whoring– Part II

Posted in Life, Work at 8:03 am by Faith

Out of College Town today. I’m in the middle of freaking NOWHERE! On a job interview… in the middle of freaking NOWHERE!

…. at least they have Internet. 🙂

The fun resumes tomorrow.

April 19, 2007

The Art of Whoring Oneself…

Posted in Life, Random, Work at 3:23 pm by Faith

Sorry for the delay in posts these last couple of days. I’ve been on the job hunt. I’ve had a couple of second interviews with some pretty interesting offices. I get the impression that they’re all looking for someone enthusiastic and spunky. I’m hoping that I’m coming across as that person.

Don’t want to say too much out of fear I’ll jinx it. If anything concrete comes in, I’ll keep you posted.

April 3, 2007

Observations From Work

Posted in Karate Kid, Life, Love, Work at 12:23 pm by Faith

You know you have to have been in a BAD relationship when, some three months later, a supervisor who you NEVER talk to (and for all you know, knows NOTHING about your personal life) pulls you to the side and says:

“Faith, you should break up with your boyfriends more often. You were a good employee to begin with… but now you’re just GREAT. It’s like this giant weight has been lifted off of you.”

Well, so to speak, I guess a huge weight WAS lifted off of me: My 170-lb ex-boyfriend, his 50-lb daughter, and at times, the 130-lb psychotic ex. Not carrying all THAT weight around would boost ANYONE’S morale… Just sayin’.